Social Dating Guide

So, you’re interested in dating and getting to know people, and with the huge popularity of social networking, you’re wondering if there is a way to use this to meet new people instead of using dating sites.

There are pros and cons to using a social networking site to date. There’s no reason that you can’t create a dating social network for yourself, but you need to realize that there are some different etiquette rules on social networking sites, and if you violate them, you will make yourself very unwelcome.

The pro of joining a dating site is that everyone is there for the same reason: to meet new people to date. On a social networking site, people are there to socialize. If you approach someone on Twitter or Facebook and ask them out too quickly, you’re going to come off as a creepy stalker.

But don’t write the sites off too quickly – they have some big advantages too. People on social networking sites are much more likely to reveal their true selves then they will on dating sites. On dating sites, since the main focus is on attracting a mate, people tend to greatly exaggerate good qualities or outright lie to make themselves look better. Married people become single. Short men become tall. Overweight women dig up their old “skinny” high school photo to use for a profile picture.

On a social networking site, people are doing the equivalent of hanging out at a pub or a relaxed social setting where they are truly there to meet new people – men, women, married, single – and share common interests. They are much likely to be show who they really are, without trying to airbrush themselves into false perfection.

So how DO you pursue dating on social networking sites without coming off like a weirdo?

One of the ways around this is to start out by joining a local group – say, twitterers in Boston – and start socializing by posting regularly on that group. When that group has “tweetups”, you can attend and meet people and socialize in person.

There are also Twitter apps that are dedicated to dating, such as flirt140, and Twitter parties specifically geared towards dating.

On Facebook, you can indicate if you are married or single or in a relationship. Facebook also has dating apps which allow you to search for compatible people.

Myspace is a very social, music oriented site. If that’s your scene, once you start building up a following of friends on Myspace, it’s not hard to meet up with like-minded people at local nightclubs or shows and see if there’s chemistry.

So what’s the key to dating using social networking sites? Going slowly and being patient. You’ll have to take the time to develop a rapour with someone, or join a social group and participate regularly, before you can ask someone out.

And that brings us back to one of the advantages of dating sites: you can cut to the chase much more quickly, invite the person you like out to coffee, and save a lot of time and effort.

The best thing to do is to experiment with both styles of online dating – social sites and dating sites – and decide which one you personally are most comfortable with.

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